I know too many people who have been sexually abused. It would be nice to know more, there is safty in numbers. There is a line though. If you plan on telling someone, how do you know who to tell and who not to? I know alot of people don’t feel that way, that they would rather keep these things to themselves, it is easier to pretend that everything is ok and just get on with life. But what if you meet someone who is struggeling with the same issue? What is the good christian thing to do? I think a part of being christian is being honest with the people you meet. Honest in the right context though, there is such a thing as too much information. I have told people about what happened and it was a weight off my mind. Just talking about it doesn’t fix it though. So now what do I do?

Prayer counselling, chrisitian counselling, normal people counselling or see my G.P? I really don’t want my dad to find out, but I can’t get a job and pay for it myself. I could just ask for money for dinner, not spend it and save up over time. There is the free option, prayer counselling, but I’m not going to do it just on the basis that it’s free. Though the prayer part seems like a great idea. I don’t know if I’m comfortable talking to someone I’ve just met. So that really eliminates all the options. But I can’t not go… I don’t think I can move on without talking to someone… I still don’t know if I’m looking for my quick fix or somthing that I’m willing to fight for. I can’t just sit around the house for much longer when life goes on around me, like I don’t exsist anymore, like I’m not important. I don’t know if I can fight for me if I don’t think I’m valuable enough for people to actually want me there. So sitting at home writing blogs is what I’ll do instead, for the time being this is my place. Or it will be until I change my mind.